Monday, October 01, 2007

Late Night Comedians - A Good Laugh!

More good laughs! I love Jay Leno. We love to tape him when he does his Tuesday night "Headlines." They are amazingly funny! I love "Jay Walking" too. People have said that he only puts the craziest things people say on the air. Well, of course he does! Who wants to watch smart people answer the questions. What you need to focus on is: Are these people for real? He asked a lady one day," What is the name of the ocean off the California coast"? She answered, "The Atlantic". She lived in California!!!

A Good Laugh:
9/27/2007 brought to you by AgWeb.com

Jay Leno: “I guess ‘Resident Evil’ drew a lot of attention this past weekend. Not the movie, the Iranian president.”

Jay Leno: “As you know, the president of Iran, Mahmoud ‘I’m A Nut Job’ has arrived in the United States. You know he was issued a visa to come here? Isn’t that amazing? You need a visa to get into the United States now? When did they start with that?”

Jay Leno: “Anyway, earlier today -- earlier today, ‘I’m A Nut Job’ spoke to students at Columbia University. You know why he chose Columbia? … Because he said Notre Dame’s football program sucks this year.”

Jay Leno: “Actually, there’s a lot of controversy over letting him speak at Columbia. Although the dean of the university said that he would even let Hitler speak. That’s what he said. Apparently, he didn’t realize he just did.”

Jay Leno: “Anyway, as you know, -- ‘I’m A Nut Job’, whatever his name is – he’s against drugs, he’s against alcohol, against premarital sex, against homosexuality and pornography. What’s he speaking at a college for? Good luck finding any common ground with those kids.”

Jay Leno: “In his speech, he said, ‘There are no homosexuals in Iran.’ That’s what he said. Too bad, because they need somebody to choreograph those parades they have every week, you know?”

Jay Leno: “According to a new report out of Cuba, Fidel Castro is near death, but is clinging to life, and he is determined to outlive the Bush Presidency. Wow. Just like Dan Rather.”

Jay Leno: “And Hillary Clinton gave an interview to the gay magazine ‘The Advocate.’ And when asked about the rumor that she was a lesbian, Hillary denied it. Hillary said she is not a lesbian. And a confused President Bush said today he has no problem with anybody being a lesbian, as long as they are in this country legally.”

Jay Leno: “And presidential candidate Rudolph Giuliani also on the campaign trail. He spoke to the NRA -- the National Rifle Association -- last week. And he tried to appeal to them by saying that two of his marriages were shotgun weddings.”

Jay Leno: “And the ‘Forbes’ list of the 400 richest Americans is out. Everybody on the list is now a billionaire. You can’t even be a millionaire and be on the list. You have to be a billionaire to be on the list. So, see that? The Bush tax cuts are working.”

David Letterman: “Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is here to visit the U.N. and also to recover some stolen sports memorabilia.”

Conan O’Brien: “The president of Iran gave a speech in New York City today, and thousands of New Yorkers are really upset about it. Yeah. Yeah, the New Yorkers said, ‘If we want to hear a short-tempered Iranian man yell at us, we’ll take a cab.’”

Conan O’Brien: “But during his speech at Columbia University, President Ahmadinejad says his country, this is a quote, ‘doesn’t have a problem with gay people because they don’t have homosexuals in Iran,’” which “finally explains why Ahmadinejad gets away with wearing a windbreaker from 1983.”

Conan O’Brien: “This Saturday, President Bush will be on hand in Washington to celebrate the seventh annual National Book Festival. That’s right. The President is very excited about the festival because he’s been named Cliff Notes’ Man of the Year.”

This is not a paid post. Just thought you'd enjoy it.